Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Man with a Van

As I have said before: making movies is a journey. Maybe more like a quest.

You will meet Challenges and obstacles on your quest. And whilst seemingly difficult to overcome - They can be conquered.

Our first and biggest problem was finding a location. We desperately needed a place large enough to accomodate our crew and equipment but that we could make look like a small dingy flat.

I was talking to a good friend I realised he was collecting the keys to his new house in a few weeks.

"Listen - I don't suppose I can shoot this thing in your new house can I?"
"Shit man, that is serious - you don't know HOW much of a problem this was for us finding a location. You are saving my ass in a big way. I'll buy you and your missus dinner as a thank you."
"Nah, don't bother - what are friends for?"

And that was that.

I have managed to get a location free of charge, I have painted it and found furniture to fill it up with - all free of charge.

Yesterday I had a simple but huge challenge - Finding a way to MOVE the furniture to our location. (The first person who was helping me let me down) It was a really fucker, cos I promised the art director I would get it done by today and I like to always do as I say I am going to do.

Anyway, I refused to be gazumped by such a simple problem so I went to my Dad's local pub and asked him if he knew anybody with a van who could help me out. Within minutes I was on my way to a bloke who owed my dad a favour and then zim-zalaa-bim he agreed to help me out.

The bloke picked me up this morning and we went to the location and set everything up. In the end it only took 18 minutes. Anyway, I then met the art director again and we went through the props list and sorted out where we were gonna get all the stuff from.

My job right now is to paint a set of 100 fairy lights with nail polish to make them blue.

All good fun


Monday, November 28, 2005

With a Little Help from my Friends.

If you cannot rely upon your family and friends... Who CAN you rely on?


Luckily enough for me, I have 4 friends who are helping me out immeasurably in the making of this short film. Today work began in earnest. I took a friend and went to the location and met the Art Director and we went through the design ideas for the house we are shooting in. Tomorrow at 7:30 am I met the same friend and we will begin painting the rooms.

I am having a little trouble adjusting from working nights to now being on a day shift pattern - Yesterday I went to bed at 08:30am and woke up at 17:30... and today I was up at 09:00. Tomorrow I have to be up at 07:00!!

Anyhow, I am really fucking knackered now... I was gonna do a little work now at home but the most constructive use of my time will be to watch an episode of The Wire (I am on season 2.) and then go to bed.

(fuck - I have 5 emails to write.)

Ah well.


Thursday, November 24, 2005

The Final Day

And now, the end has come. It is 06:22am and my last shift finishes in 38 minutes.

I've been here in the same tiny office for 2 years and 8 months. I can't profess to love this job but just now, after I have just said my farewells (and wished them all, 'peace and love') I feel a small twinge of sadness.

I almost want to shed a tear - not really sadness, not really excitement - but it#s just emotional. It is emotional saying goodbye. I said to them ,
"I don't believe in goodbye, I will see you all again - if not in this life, but in the next."

And it's true - I don't believe in goodbye - you take pieces of people with you - those who touch you for the better, you carry their spirit with you. It becomes you. Their essence touches you.

It makes me hope that in some way, that my presence here touched them in the same way that their presense has touched me. I hope they remember the Lord of Doom.

But it is not goodbye, I'm sure I'll see some of them again.

So - why am I sad? I suppose because it is the end of something. The paradigm is shifting away from it's present condition. This place. Thess people. The essense will be gone. As soon as I walk out of the office door which is right behind me.

I will go outside. Wait for the bus and go home.

My short film will occupy my time and very quickly I will forget this place. But the people here. I will remember them.

And for you, my precious readers, I offer you Peace and Love as always.



Wednesday, November 23, 2005


Tonight is my last night at work - I've been here, in London working nights for almost 3 years.

From 07:00am tomorrow I officially have ZERO INCOME - I will be unemployed. I think I'll even sign on.

That will be fun.

I have this short film which will keep me busy until 11th Dec. and after that...

Well... We'll have to see.

Blah blah, my showreel is almost finished - I have *finally* got the renders from the computer animator - I have not looked at them for fear that they are fucking shit... if they are then I'm in trouble.

I'm sticking my head in the sand here, I know I need to check them and then take any appropriate action...

Fuck it. I'll check them now.

If they're good then I will complete the project this week.

If they're shit - then I'll have to get somebody to re-do it.

(I know I said I would be vanishing for a while - but I'm gonna have to take a chance here... it's a 50/50 whether or not I have been comprimised...)

Tuesday, November 22, 2005


Due to rapid and unforseen developments my anonymity as Author of this blog has been comprimised - therefore I have to suspend the updating of this blog. So until I either:

a) Move this blog.


b) Delete it.

Then you won't be hearing much from me.

This is a terrible shame - but I need to protect myself in a professional capacity from any complications further down the line.




I have just bought BOTH these pairs of sunglasses - each with prescription lenses, brand new, mint condition, boxed, from a shop on Oxford Street in London. The top pair should have cost me £280 (with super thin lenses) I got them for £133. The bottom pair should have cost me £180 - I got them for £50.


And it really works.

I don't know what it is about sunglasses - but I fucking love them. And Gucci Sunglasses are the best.

I HATE PEOPLE who buy sunglasses and talk shit about how much UV-A UV-B they stop and blah blah about how good it is to drive and the glare and piss and shit. You know these people - fucking geeks - who buy a pair of Oakleys and think they are the shit. Why do LOSERS and SPOILT little rich kids wear OAKLEYS? And then talk shit about the UV protection.


Anybody that says anything else is a lying cunt.

And Oakleys are not cool. They are bought by rich american tourists for 5% less when purchased at a airport.

5%? Is it worth the fucking hassle?

I am wearing my GUCCIs now. And they protect me from the glare of this monitor. Never mind the damage I am doing by squinting at the screen just to see what I am typing.

But I look cool.

And you don't.


Monday, November 21, 2005


It is now 18 Days until we shoot.


These are CRUCIAL ROLES which need filling ASAP.

We do have a confirmed CAST, computer animator, 95% completed script, and a confirmed LOCATION amonst other things. These are good things.

I want to get some house music sorted for the soundtrack before we shoot - but realistically it can wait til afterwards.

This film making malarky is a passionate and exciting journey. I am against the notion of auteur theory - where the film director sees all and knows all. I don't think it happens. At least not any more. I think a film director can lead people and inspire them with passion and creativity - but essentially moviemaking is a collaboration - and any film maker than things he in 100% in control if a fucking liar. Peter Jackson might have done a fantastic job directing Lord of the Rings, but the thousands of people that were involved in that all collaborated to create something bigger than the sum of it's part... but the sum of it's collective parts nonetheless.

But this lack of control - to a fanatical control freak it is a nightmare.

Each person you enroll in helping you, you surrender an element of control. Try and guide them if you can... But

The real trick is surrendering control to somebody who knows what they are doing. Ideally somebody better than you.

Then it is easy. Because you have trust.

Not TRUSTING those you surrender control to is a killer.

Peace and love as always.



ps. hope this makes sense. I rush most posts.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

22 Days until shooting

I wrote up some design notes to give to the potential Art Director. She likes the script and wants to see the notes before agreeing to work on it. As a freebie it won't pay so she doesn't want to give up too much time for nothing.

Also had to draft up some notes to woo the potential Directors of Photography. This is CRUCIAL. Finding a Good DOP will make or break this project.


a) I need to get on with them

b) They need to be fast.

c) They need to be talented.

(in reverse order)

Also, I'm gonna do a polish on the script this weekend.

Tomorrow I need to go into London to approve the new pair of Gucci Sunglasses I have ordered in at the opticians. The last pair they fucked up so they have had to order a new pair in and I have decided to chane the style and colour.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

The Pressure Grows

The pressure grows as I am heading towards the shooting of my short film.

On the plus side:

I had a meeting with one of the actresses today - nothing too heavy like a rehearsal - just a quick and eay chat over a cup of tea in London.

On the Minus Side:

The editor has read the script and says that he does not think it is structured well enough for him to work on it as a freebie.
Not the end of the world - as we can get another editor (bit of a bummer cos this guy was good) But more importantly, as an editor, this dude KNOWS about movies. So if he says it is not clearly structured then I need to pay attention.

So it seems the script still needs work. I am ready to do one more polish - but I don't quite have the time for a major re-write because I want to crack it and get it finished and finalised. Yet somehow I get the impression that this fucking script is gonna get written and re-written RIGHT up to when we are shooting.

Which is in 23 days.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

SMOKE (Pacha) London - Friday Nights

I had a dream on Thursday night where I told everybody how AWESOME the club night at Pacha was on Friday night.

I woke up on Friday morning and realised that it had not passed yet. I had not been, yet somehow I knew my dream would come true...

Anyway, 12 of us went to dinner for my friends birthday, as a favour I made sure we were all on the guest list for the club later- in the end - 3 of us went to the club. (the rest of them went home)

I've never been to Pacha in London before (I've been to the Sharm El Sheikh in Egypt one - but that doesn't really count) but never London. I knew it by reputation - the funny thing is that not many of my friends are really into that kind of music so it is actually quite a hard place for me to go to because I have nobody to go with. But I've ALWAYS wanted to go.

And my girlfriend (God bless her) tell me that she hates house music. So that makes it difficult.

She prefers Drum and Bass - Anyway - All I can say it that I HAVE CONVERTED HER. SHE FUCKING LOVES IT. Which brings a certian ammount of smug satisfaction to me. She loves it - in fact she says it is the BEST NIGHT OUT SHE'S EVER HAD IN LONDON. Furthermore, I say the same thing - in fact - All three of us who went agreed that it was the greatest club night in London that we have ever been to.


If you disagree with me then you can kiss my hairy ass.

I am 27 and my girlfriend is 21, I have PROMISED her and me that I will KEEP on going to nightclubs and having the BEST possible time for as LONG as I want to. (The other 9 people who went to dinner were all in the mid/late 20's and they were all too BORING and sad to come out to the club)

(Admittedly, due to various reasons the last six months have been quite low on the night club front and I have not been out THAT much - but I NEVER WANT TO BE THAT FUCKING BORING.)

Anyway, I posted a while ago that I was bored - Well I can totally say that Friday Night at Pacha was ALL the medicine I needed to give my life some colour and sound. And I don't even drink or take drugs.

Go figure.

For you, my dear reader, I am listening right now to a HED KANDI Twisted Disco CD and remembering my cool night out. As always I wish you peace and love.

And invite YOU to go to Pacha too.

Because it fucking rocks.


Friday, November 11, 2005


I am excited!

Tonight I am off to Pacha in London!

I've never been there before and it looks like it's gonna ROCK.

Woo hoo!

I'll let you know how it was.

Oh yeah... My beautiful 21 year old girlfriend is training to be a teacher... and 'Miss' has given me detention this Sunday.

What is a man to do?


Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Aid and Assistance.

I consider film making to be a journey - from the very first word written down until final sound effect is added there is a creative process and along the way are stumbling blocks, difficulties, tests and problems.

I have recently become tense because of the problem I have with finding a location for this short film. The location is CRITICAL for this project - nearly everything else is sorted.

The story is set in a dingy flat - but shooting in a dingy flat will be impossible because we need SPACE for cast, crew, lights, camera.

In the middle of my stress I get talking to my friend who I suddenly realise has just bought a house -


We'll have a LOT of space. The house in scarcely furnished, so I can fill it with whatever I like, and make it look really dingy. Also, we'll have parking, electricity, a green room for the actors and LOTS OF SPACE.

And best of all the location is totally free.

Fucking magic.

Every now and then, along the journey people will come to your assistance.

And it fucking rocks.


Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Monetry Woes

I am soon to be unemployed.

So I need to really make some firm choices about my like and the way I live it.

My first choice is:

What is more important - 6 weeks pay OR making this short film?

I have chosen to leave my job a few weeks before the contract finishes in order to shoot this short film that I have coming up. The short term 'hit' I will take should hopefully be balanced out by the fact I am shooting my short movie. And it is one I have a lot of hopes for, I know I am ready to do something special. I fucking hope that this will help me lead onto bigger and better things.

But to make it special I have to commit some extra time into. Which means I must quit my job and lose money. And that is on TOP of this short film COSTING me money.


I have just been doing my on-line banking and credit card and shit and I have that all too familiar feeling - that one that I know YOU all get when you realise you don't have enough money.

And it sucks.

I got some choices to make.


Monday, November 07, 2005

Nothing Much

My life is fairly monotonous at the moment - a neccessary rounding off of various things.

This short film shoot is weeks away.

My job ends in less than that.

The computer animation is getting done, albeit very slowly - but needs to get done before my job ends.

All in all I am bored.

And boredom is a cunt.

It really is. It is a fucker.

I crave something exciting to happen.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Public Speaking


One of my original desires for this blog was to present an insight to the changes that a boy from South London with humble roots was making to himself in order to create a image of success. Something I think is crucial to actually leading a successful life.

Today I learned a few things when I had to stand up and give a very short introduction to a music video I directed that was premiered today at a bar in London. There were about 30 or 40 people there. A relaxed bunch.

I rarely get bothered by public speaking. Being an attention-seeker, I actually quite LIKE doing public speaking.

It is one of those things I see as tantamount in creating an illusion of success.
When I see others mumbling and stuttering, repeating words or swearing, see that it creates a negative image which is not exactly desirable. And I swear to myself that I must not let myself appear like such a muppet.

The key is to speak clearly, in a manner that is easy-going, yet authoritative. To engage the listener and speak with passion.


Today I realised that I MUST practice doing PAs with a microphone. I can speak and articulate myself quite clearly without one, BUT when talking through a microphone I have a tendancy to drop the 'boom' from my voice in order to try and hear how loud the speakers are making me. (just in case I am too loud)

Unofrtunately, when I do this my voice becomes nasally, and typically South London and then I sound more like cocknet geezer than anything else.

This is not a bad thing, but I think it ruins credibility to an extent. I don't want to sound like a stuck-up cunt by putting on a posh voice, but I find my have a differnet way of speaking depending on the situation and who I am with.

I think I can speak okay without a microphone, but I really need practise with one.

I know it sounds gay, but I think people who can speak well in public gain real advantage by doing so. They appear confident and passionate - and in my choice of career I need to be able to appear that way.

Peace and Love