Sunday, October 30, 2005

My Dream

adopt your own virtual pet!

I had a Dream Last night.

In my dream I had a pet kitten named Tyson that peddled around everywhere on a minature tricyle and went around attacking and KILLING the other CATS and DOGS in the neighbourhood.

It was the toughest mother fucking cat I have ever seen in my life.

So much so, that I was afraid it was gonna come and kill me.

What the fuck does that mean?

Peace and Love



Thursday, October 27, 2005



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Peace and Love


Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Happy Now?


Okay you rascals who are complaining that I am not blonde anymore - this is me 9 months ago when the ultra blond was growing out. I just wanted to be respectable for a while.

I am gonna do it again soon.

Don't worry.

The blonde will be back.


Monday, October 24, 2005

For One Week Only.

Ladies and Gentlemen, a rare treat for you all.

For Seven Days Only.

Some photographs of me.


Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Thursday Night Bullet Points.

1. I am on notice for my job. I have maybe 4 weeks left.

2. I am working a lot of overtime so that I have some money to live on when I am unemployed.

3. I am rushing to get the new script of my upcoming short film revised.

4. I have enlisted an animator to do the CG shots for the new short film. Cos it takes so long I need to start work on them WAY before we even start shooting.

5. I have confirmed the cast for the short film.

6. I need to find a location for the short - this is an A++ Priority

7. I am also working on a script for a feature movie which I want to shoot next year. This I am working on with an writer/actor (who is actually gonna be in the short movie). I am quite excitied - this (i hope) will be a good project.

8. The animator on the last project has decided to fuck off out of the country again. This delays the completion of the project AGAIN. In turn it means my new directing showreel is also delayed.

9. I have a few places waiting to see my showeel. Including a production company in Ukraine and an Ad Agency in London.

10. The artist that I shot a video for, SIX MONTHS AGO has *FINALLY* paid me the rest of my money. *Un-Fucking Believable.*

11. I am madly (and probably sickeningly) in love with my gorgeous 21 year old girlfriend. She is the best thing in the world.

12. I need a hair cut.

13. I went to the gym yesterday, I am slowly gaining back my former strength.

14. I can do 160 sits up in a row without stopping.

15. I managed a high score of 309,000 on Lumines. Beat THAT.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Destiny - A New Beginning

"There are many paths to the top of the mountain, but when you get there, the view is always the same." - Bethanie Odd

I have felt it coming - The eventual and the inescapable - No matter what happened I was always going to be in this place.

What the fuck?

I went into the meeting with my big boss suppressing the urge to quit... I want to leave, I don't want this job any more - it is helping me in some ways yet hindering me in others - yet money is money and it will help me out in ways that I need it to. I've got this short film coming up which I need to pay for and my showreel is virtually complete - so I need to concentrate on getting it out.

Anyway, this afternoon I said my prayers and asked for help with my career. Not this stupid job. But my career - My aspirations to be a commercials director and a film director. Grandiose perhaps? But it is what I am working towards. What I am going to to.

This evening, in the meeting I was presented; not with the answers to my prayer, but the pre-cursor to them.

Afterwards I called my girlfriend,

"Do you want the good news or the bad news?" I asked.

"Don't tell me you quit!?" She exclaimed.

"I didn't have to."

Monday, October 10, 2005


Writing can be so fucking hard.

You have a blank page and infinite possibilities of ideas to fill it with.

I am on the 4th Draft of the Short Film Script and it is TOUGH as shit.

But as well as this short - there is a feature script that I am developing along with a co-writer. This was it is easier to bounce ideas around but even then it is still really hard. But this time in a different way.

What I feel it important is to come up with something that is believable.

Even though the Feature Film is going to be a sci-fi it still has to have characters who behave and act in believable ways.

Fuckity fuck.

Even this post doesn't make any fucking sense.

I don't even know what the fuck I am trying to write to you.

Ah well... I need to get back to the writing. I am just gonna finish off the rough fourth draft of the short script now. I will worry if it all makes sense later.

Peace and Love



Sunday, October 02, 2005

Knowledge is Power

Consider this, my dear friends: Each of our lives is like a play.

We, by default, have to take the main role - but we have the freedom to play this role however we want. We can write our own scenes and write our own dialogue.

The other roles in this play are split between major and minor characters. Each of these is further split between two groups - Characters we choose and characters that are chosen for us.

For a moment I will leave this metaphorical play and talk about knowledge. There are things I know and there are things I know. The latter group is comprised of intangibles, things that don't make sense - but knowledge of them exists nonetheless.

Trivial examples of them are knowledge of when my name is going to be read out seconds before it happens, knowledge of casino roulette numbers seconds before they spin in, knowledge of when my girlfriend is gonna call me.

Now - returning to the play analogy - I have discovered who one of the major characters in my life story is.

For 26 and a half years I did not know this person - even though she is to become the greatest and most significant character in my owb play of my life story.

I used to wonder - how would I recognise her when I met her? How would I know that it was HER and not nobody else?

I supposed there was no answer.

But I was wrong.

Well since dating this girl I have been quietly confident that she is the one. And it has afforded me a certain arrogant smugness - which does makes things a lot more interesting. Even though I was confident enough to tell my mum and dad that this was a the girl I might marry my feelings were only ever about 99.8% certain.

Anyway, three days ago something changed - some new crazy feeling I get when I look at her. I don't see her as who she is anymore - I see her as who she is going to be. Being with her is the most natural thing in the world. I can truly say that although I have no immediate plans to marry her I now have absolutely confident that I will.

There is no logic or reasoning to it.

But it feels so perfectly right.

I get this amazing feeling when I am with her that I am outside of my body and looking in - and I am watching this PLAY of my life - And I am watching myself with her and it all adds up - it all makes sense.

And this is how I know.

Because I detach myself from me and look in to my life.

And what I see is magic.

So for you dear reader I feel presumptuous enough to offer advice.

How do you know if he/she is the one?

You just do.

Not through deduction, attraction, logic, happiness or any of that shit. Don't write a list. Don't think about it.

If you can look at your life like you are the central character and you can see him/or her as playing opposite you - then that it is all you need.

How will you find them?

Open your eyes. Open your heart. Learn the lessons you need to learn. Let the past stay where it belongs.

Peace and Love