Tuesday, December 13, 2005


Firat things first - for those of you interested - The shoot is complete.


Yesterday at around 2:00pm I found myself wandering along the high street all on my own. The shoot was over and I was making my way home. I will never get used to the sudden feeling of emptiness and lonliness that comes when a shoot in finished. For 2 weeks solid I have been working on making this production come together. And the egomaniac in me has loved the attention that it creates.

For the last 5 days, I have been a movie director - I have been doing my job and following my heart. It might have been a short film, but essentially on a day to day basis it was not that different to a feature film. I say this because the set-up we had going was very, very professional. Many 'civilians' who have come to my shoots have always and suddenly been very taken back by the level of professionalism and production values that we have going on. I owe this to the producer who I have been working with for the last few years.

Anyway, yesterday evening when I did my round of phone call to thank the crew for their help and assistance I made sure I mentioned to them a specific thing that I had noticed them accomplish. And in doing so, it made me too appeciate the level of professionalism involved by each and every one of them. It was a freebie short movie that everybody involved with did for nothing. All we paid them for was their expenses. But from the crew, I witnessed so much effort, passion and skill.

Why did the crew all work for nothing?

Well, they all have their reasons, which I shall not bother to speculate about here - but it is a humbling experience being surrounded by such talent and skill. Furthermore, it is humbling because it all happened because a while ago I made a decision for it to happen. The spark of an idea that I had when I wanted to make another short film I had to nuture and build until it created an organic force strong enough to manifest itself.

This process is as mysterious and it is exciting as it is empowering. And I love it. I love it like nothing else I can do on this earth. Immediately after the shoot I film myself craving this fix again. When My girlfriend came along to the set she said she saw me in a state that she had never seen me in before. In her words, I was 'glowing' and she said she saw me in my 'element'. These kind words from her are also uplifting and empowered.

So here I am, craving the fix like some kind of Crack Head Madman... So I have no choice... I NEED to find more projects to direct... so if you have a music videos you want somebody to shoot, or an advert, short movie, or a feature film then drop me a line... Because I am a mother fucking addict and I need to jack myself up.

Love, peace and kisses,




Blogger RuKsaK said...

Sounds like a great feeling and well done man - when I write a book, and it gets made into a film, you'll be my man!

12/13/2005 3:18 pm  
Anonymous Utopia said...

Congrats on completion of the hard(sp?) part. Now the editing. I hope it turns out to be everything you hoped.

12/13/2005 3:18 pm  
Blogger RuKsaK said...

That was some ego I showed in that comment - it was tongue-in-cheek about my own abilities - not yours.

12/13/2005 3:19 pm  
Blogger Doom/Blondie said...

Utopia - thank you - whatever it turns out as, it is a crucial step that I KNOW is going to lead me places.

Ruksay - relax - I did not see any flippancy in your comment.

12/13/2005 11:14 pm  
Blogger Smartypants said...

This was the post I was waiting for. Good for you.

= )

12/14/2005 4:00 am  
Blogger LeeLoreya said...

I loved the way you shared this with your readers as the weeks passed by and the excruciating anticipation grew...

12/14/2005 9:06 pm  
Blogger Doom/Blondie said...

good to share


12/15/2005 12:24 am  
Blogger bethanie_odd said...

what a process. i love when people who are in your life get to see when you are doing what you want to be doing. it is like they are truly getting a window into who you are. good job doom. i can't wait to see the result.

12/15/2005 12:59 am  
Blogger Roo said...


12/15/2005 1:24 am  
Anonymous heroinegirl said...

Yay, excellent.
I am so glad everything goes well for you. Peace and love.

12/15/2005 10:00 am  
Blogger Doom/Blondie said...

Beth -- indeed - I am glad she saw me so now she can know how important this is to me.

roo -- thanks (blushing)

Heroinegirl -- I'll see you soon

12/15/2005 11:14 pm  

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