Task fucking Master
I am a man with a lot on his mind.
None of it is really as complicated as I sometimes think it is, but I have so much fuckin shit to do.
The absolute tasks I have to do are in this order, split into 2 groups:
GROUP A - High Priority
1. Finish the music and the compositing for the test commercial.
2. Compile, design (include shooting and editing the transitions), edit, author and duplicate my directing showreel.
GROUP B - Mid Priority
3. Get stuck into the pre-production on this short film. Scripting, casting, locations and blah de blah.
4. Find another music video to direct. (this is tough because at my level there a a FUCK LOAD of timewasters with a lot of expectations and fuck all money.)
There is another long term task which was revealed to me in my epiphany a few weeks but that starts after I complete tasks 1-3.
I came close to quitting my job today, as it stands I am about to take a month off work in order to concentrate on finishing tasks 1 and 2. The "relative" peanuts I earn from my job do not in any way make up for the huge distraction that having to work 3 days a week does to my list of tasks.
Not having disposable money will hurt, but I have spoken to my girlfriend and she is behind me.
This helps. A lot.
Anyway, I am making choices which frighten and excite me in equal measure. My apologies if nothing exciting seems to be happening for me to blog about recently, I am just stuck with my head down trying to do the work I need to do.
Hard work and dedication are not especially glamorous, yet in real terms, I am at the most exciting time of my life ever. If i do quit my job (get sacked or walk out) and end up with no income, I wonder that when I stroll around in my tailored suit meeting people trying to pretend that I know my arse from my elbow - will they be able to see right through me?
Have I gained enough life experience to be able to convince those I need to convince that I am able to do the jobs I will be trying for?
I know that every day people get paid fuck loads of money to do shit that they have no fucking clue about. Can I become at least one of them? Better yet, will I be able to be better than them?
I hope so, yet I won't presume that I will without hard work and effort.
That is not to say that I don't what I am doing, but then again, who the fuck am I to say that I do know what I am doing?
I just got to pretend that I do know what I am doing, and then shut the fuck up and learn from others.
Oh fuck it.
So much shit.
xxx
None of it is really as complicated as I sometimes think it is, but I have so much fuckin shit to do.
The absolute tasks I have to do are in this order, split into 2 groups:
GROUP A - High Priority
1. Finish the music and the compositing for the test commercial.
2. Compile, design (include shooting and editing the transitions), edit, author and duplicate my directing showreel.
GROUP B - Mid Priority
3. Get stuck into the pre-production on this short film. Scripting, casting, locations and blah de blah.
4. Find another music video to direct. (this is tough because at my level there a a FUCK LOAD of timewasters with a lot of expectations and fuck all money.)
There is another long term task which was revealed to me in my epiphany a few weeks but that starts after I complete tasks 1-3.
I came close to quitting my job today, as it stands I am about to take a month off work in order to concentrate on finishing tasks 1 and 2. The "relative" peanuts I earn from my job do not in any way make up for the huge distraction that having to work 3 days a week does to my list of tasks.
Not having disposable money will hurt, but I have spoken to my girlfriend and she is behind me.
This helps. A lot.
Anyway, I am making choices which frighten and excite me in equal measure. My apologies if nothing exciting seems to be happening for me to blog about recently, I am just stuck with my head down trying to do the work I need to do.
Hard work and dedication are not especially glamorous, yet in real terms, I am at the most exciting time of my life ever. If i do quit my job (get sacked or walk out) and end up with no income, I wonder that when I stroll around in my tailored suit meeting people trying to pretend that I know my arse from my elbow - will they be able to see right through me?
Have I gained enough life experience to be able to convince those I need to convince that I am able to do the jobs I will be trying for?
I know that every day people get paid fuck loads of money to do shit that they have no fucking clue about. Can I become at least one of them? Better yet, will I be able to be better than them?
I hope so, yet I won't presume that I will without hard work and effort.
That is not to say that I don't what I am doing, but then again, who the fuck am I to say that I do know what I am doing?
I just got to pretend that I do know what I am doing, and then shut the fuck up and learn from others.
Oh fuck it.
So much shit.
xxx
posted by Doom/Blondie at Thursday, July 28, 2005
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