Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Mission Impossible?

MISSION OBJECTIVE - To establish contact with the host family.

CONSIDERATIONS - You will be dropped deep behind enemy lines. You must remain there for 2 days before hitting the RV and returning to base. Locals are to be considered hostile.

Be advised that a cat lives in the house and this might bring you out in an allergic reaction. You must also try to control your continued food poisoning.

Storage space will be limited - In your inventory you must take

i. Your Deadly charm.
ii. Your midnight blue custom tailored 2 button suit. (Fitted look style)
iii. your brilliant white Gieves and Hawkes double-cuff slim fit shirt (which you bought yesterday)
iv. A large bouquet of flowers. (Which you must choose and purchase once you are behind enemy lines.)
v. Your personal communicator.
vi. Your gilette mach 4 turbo extra sharp vibrating razor blade.
vii. Your Jasper Conran Man Aftershave.


I have just returned from up north. I virtually met my girlfriend's whole family - and ALL of them for the first time.

It was a wedding I went to - my not so hidden agenda was to make a good impression on them. According to battlefield intelligence reports I accomplished this task successfully. The final debriefing session on the train home as I returned to London with my head held high confirmed the early intelligence reports:

They liked me.

Woo hoo.


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